I always feel like somebody's watching me.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Never leave a paper trail.

My kindergartner had her first note sent home from school this weekend. I had to compose myself in my bedroom before talking to her about it. It read as follows:

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Eyebrows,

At the end of the day today as I was passing out papers, I noticed that Piper had written the word "butt" on two of her papers from Computer class and intended to give them to two of her friends. When I asked her why she wrote this on her papers, she said she learned that word from the movie "Despicable Me." We talked about how that is not an appropriate word to use in school. She visited with Mrs. Principal and Mr. Computer. Thank you for visiting with her for me at home.

Since this did not occur in the classroom, if you have any questions or need further explanation, please contact Mr. Computer.

Thank you!
Mrs. Kindergarten

Ok, obviously I've renamed some people. Included with this letter were two pictures she had made and, in fact, written the word "butt" on in crayon. One picture did look like minion butt cheeks from the movie where the minions are making photo copies of their butts. I'm willing to argue however that my child did not, in fact, learn the word "butt" from "Despicable Me".

When I found the letter, Piper saw that I had found it and ran to her room crying, "I didn't mean to!" After taking the time to compose my own laughter, my husband and I went to talk to her. She was under her covers crying. She definitely will not be writing the word "butt" on any school papers again, poor thing. We talked about how it's not appropriate and then told her about her older sister's notes that were sent home from school in the past. Her older sister was there to confirm our story and she helped us to make Piper feel better. Seriously, if writing "butt" on a couple papers is the worst thing she ever does, I'm a proud mom.

I'm keeping the letter and the pictures to someday show to her future husband or display with her graduation pictures.

We were watching a nature show about monkeys a day later and somehow it came about that monkeys are known for throwing poop.

"I would like a pet monkey mom, but since they throw poop, I can't have one, right?" She asked me later that night.

"Right. Please don't share your monkey knowledge at school though, okay Piper?"

"Okay mommy." She smiled at me knowingly.

There are 21 school days left. I hope we can make it.


  1. I love this! Piper is top of the class as far as I'm concerned

  2. Yeah, she's a chip off the ole block.

  3. Good luck with these remaining 21 days!

    IMHO, the assignment sounds fridge-worthy.

  4. Butt..Mom! It's so much funny saying butt!

  5. First time here.
    Its good that you are preseving those.
    When they grow up they will cherish it.

  6. This post made my day! Your little girl sounds like a handful but those kind grow up to be awesome adults!


  7. She sounds like someone who calls it as she sees it.

    I popped in to give you the Stylish Blogger & Versatile Blogger Awards. Stop by my blog at http://joycelansky.blogspot.com tomorrow after 4:30 AM central time to pick them up. Some goofy rules come with them, but I'm sure you'll figure it out.


  8. Another award!? Dude...I don't know if anything can top the Worst Mommy Ever Award, but I'm sure honored!

  9. I love your butt story, and this post. Too cute that she was worried about the stuffed monkey. I see you won a worst mommy ever award, so you probably wont be offended that I homeschool and my kids can write butt on their papers when ever they want. I just laugh. I just found you on humor bloggers. I am new there and your newest follower here.

  10. I suppose the fact that we send our kids to Catholic School probably has something to do with "butt" being a "big deal". If we weren't blessed with the ability to send our kids to a faith-based school, I would homeschool too. Rhonda-kudos!!!

  11. My son, who's a sophomore at a magnet school for math and science, recently received a 50 on an English paper. Since we think he's a pretty good writer, we questioned the teacher about it in an email. The teacher said that he had used the word "hell" in the paper and he automatically deducts 50 points for profanity. And he agreed that my son is a very strong writer. We were astounded. Fifty points? Really? No more ifs, ands, or butts here!